Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
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