this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
