I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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