Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(419): View more from Ohio

your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy

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(616): View more from Michigan

theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.

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(310): View more from California

So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.

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(214): View more from Texas

bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.

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(916): View more from California

Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash

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(661): View more from California

CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER

(605): View more from South Dakota

IM LONELY AND HORNY

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(801): View more from Utah

Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?

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