Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
