stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
