my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
