he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
