i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
