Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
