Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
