ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
