Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
