Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
