They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize