if i died would you start the facebook group?
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I think my moral compass just broke
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