No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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