Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize
