you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
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