I accidentally had phone sex last night
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
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