My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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