I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Randomize
