If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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