He kissed a someone with a penis
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
