I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
My feet surprised me
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