using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Randomize