Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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