Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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