ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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