Im at strip club and am horny
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
