just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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