I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
