Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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