I've blown a few things in my day
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
