I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
