He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
