bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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