everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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