Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
