And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
