wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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