Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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