Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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