My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
This is the prime rib incident all over again
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
