I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
