She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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