I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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