Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
