I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize