I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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