I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
