The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
