remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
